Review: Halo by Frankie Rose

Posted on February 6, 2014February 5, 2014 by Cass | Author : Cass | book reviews> Draconismoi> ebooks> NetGalley

Format read: eARC from Netgalley
Formats available: ebook, POD
Genre: YA Dystopian
Series: Blood & Fire #1
Length: 354 pages
Publisher: CreateSpace
Date Released: January 10, 2014
Purchasing Info: Author’s Website, Goodreads, Amazon, Smashwords, Barnes & Noble.

She has no name.

She has her knives; her training; her halo.

The first and second give her the tools and the skill to defeat the opponents she is pitched against each month. The third frees her from pain and fear. From any kind of emotion at all. Everything is as it should be. Everything is as it should be, until…

FearPainAngerHappinessDesireGuilt

Love.

When a newly-named Kit escapes the Sanctuary after killing her best friend, the last thing she needs is another knife in her hand. Or Ryka, the damaged, beautiful blonde boy, who she refuses to let save her. Still learning how to process the onslaught of her new feelings, the sights and sounds of Freetown are overwhelming and strange. There are a hundred differences between her old home and her new one, but one thing remains starkly similar: the matches. Yet where the blood in the Sanctuary landed only on the colosseum floor, Kit will quickly learn that a river of red runs through Freetown’s very streets.

Freed from the oppression of a society who stole her right to feel, the true horror of her old life leaves Kit wondering if she really has been freed at all. Would she be better off without the crippling horror of all the blood on her hands, or is the love of one boy worth living through all the pain?

Raksha is the call of the dead. The rumbling chant for fresh blood from the other side, the demand for sacrifice. The colosseum is behind Kit. The fighting pits await.

My Thoughts:

Following the massive success of The Hunger Games, it is only to be expected that pale imitations will crop up in a blatant attempt to ride those multi-million dollar coattails. This has led to a absolute flurry of Dytopian YA publishing. And let me just say how excited I am to see Dystopian YA edging out all the Twi-lites and Twi-harders. You cannot write a Dystopian YA that I am not going to read.

As with any imploding subgenre, there are fantastic additions (Shatter Me), middle of the pack reads that quickly blur together (Divergent), and non-sensical piles of shit that completely miss the point of the entire goddamn genre.

Guess where on the scale Halo falls?

Halo has an extremely promising start. I greatly enjoyed the Hunger Games meets the Roman Colosseum vibe. In this rigidly class-divided world, you are born and bred for a specific station. Our protagonist is one of the Falin (fighters), whose entire purpose in life is to fight, kill, and die for the entertainment of the bloodthirsty masses. The upperclass “Trues” are socialized to see the Falin as contemptible subhuman animals, thus preventing any niggling morality issues with the monthly child slaughter, while the Falin are drugged and brainwashed into emotionless automatons. This keeps the Falin from uniting to kill their captors.

(This tactic comes highly recommended by Eric Northman.)

Ahem. Back to the Dystopian.

The problems with Halo come once Kit escapes from the walled and isolated Sanctuary.

People outside Sanctuary are spread out in cities and towns across the country. Kit stumbles into the nearby Freetown, where she is immediately introduced to a society without the rigid class structures she is accustomed too. However, this so-called “free” town has ridiculously oppressive laws/customs against women.

Kit quickly learns that women are required to wear skirts covered in freaking bells. (A noise burka!) When she notes this would prevent her from, say, quietly moving around town, defending herself from attack, or even outright running away from danger, she learns this is a non-issue! Because women are forbidden from fighting, being educated in any kind of physical art, or carrying anything that could be construed as a weapon. If Kit doesn’t want to be attacked, sexually assaulted, and/or raped, she has to make herself utterly defenseless. Those obsessive woman-hating child-beating murdering rapists never attack teenage girls! (Aw, shucks grandpa, thanks for ‘splaining things.)

I don’t think I have ever read a book where it was so perfectly clear where it all went wrong. After an attempted gang (implied) rape, Kit is on the verge of being forced to give up her knives for her own, ahem, protection. (I’m serious, that’s their bullshit justification. That she brought the assault on herself, and one day, would totally be raped, and it would be all her fault. For daring to know how to use a knife in self-defense.) Kit beautifully acknowledges the laws of Freetown, and states that she will respect them. By leaving.

Fuck yeah! Kiss these misogynist assholes goodbye, and let their so-called enlightened abolitionist leaders take a hard look at the bullshit laws that send the newly emancipated slave out into the world looking for actual freedom. Kit could go Free Town shopping! Roam the countryside spreading enlightenment and self-defense lessons while dodging bounty hunters from Sanctuary….

Of course that didn’t happen. Instead, Kit gets special dispensation to keep her knives, and a cute teenage boy bodyguard. Because he’ll be able to keep her safe. As opposed to her training and weapons.

Then she has the privilege of spending the rest of the series fighting on behalf of the misogynist shiteaters who keep trying to kill, main, or rape her. Sit back everyone, and watch this train derail.

The point of a YA Dystopian is freedom from oppression, and coming into your own power. Not exchanging one form of slavery for another. Or being dependent on someone else to protect you when you’re 150% capable to taking care of yourself. I always tell my clients that shack up with a new man right after we’ve kicked the abusive husband to the curb to “Trade Up.”

Kit did not trade up.

Raksha

Beyond the blatant and unchallenged misogyny rampant in the book (though there is a super-special woman-hater who keeps whining about all the misandry, and how men just don’t have enough power), you’ll need to be prepared to ignore some bizarrely inept world-building.

A particularly pathetic example pops up when Freetown discusses their trading practices with Sanctuary. Apparently the high-tech walled-off city ships mass quantities of grain and other food out to the country towns in exchange for high-quality weapons produced by artisans out in the sticks.

No really, it makes sense! So long as you don’t know how industry and farming work, but do accept any and all points of plot convenience. (There are many more, this is the just the most blatantly moronic of them.)

Halo was originally published in May of 2013 as Raksha. I prefer the original cover. Kit looks a bit more like the ass-kicking knife-master she is, and less like an indecisive girl wandering aimlessly through a poorly depicted world. Oh, wait…..

Escape Rating: D- for the extreme douchebaggery of taking a goddamn champion gladiator and forcing her to defend a deeply misogynist city. Take a hint from your revamped cover Kit, and walk the fuck away.

***FTC Disclaimer: Most books reviewed on this site have been provided free of charge by the publisher, author or publicist. Some books we have purchased with our own money or borrowed from a public library and will be noted as such. Any links to places to purchase books are provided as a convenience, and do not serve as an endorsement by this blog. All reviews are the true and honest opinion of the blogger reviewing the book. The method of acquiring the book does not have a bearing on the content of the review.

Under the Tree: Happy Chrismukkawanztice!

Posted on December 25, 2013December 23, 2013 by Cass | Author : Cass | Bookish Rant or Raves> books> Christmas> Desperately Wanting Wednesday> Hanukkah> Holidays

Happy Chrismukkahwanztice Everyone! Regardless of your spiritual persuasion, Chrismukkahwanztice in the United States is essentially a celebration of capitalist excess. One in which gifts are de rigueur. Which really does make this the best time of year for us Book Pushing Book Lovers. Not only do we get lots of books – we get to force them on others! It doesn’t get any better than this!

In honor of this holiday – and assured that this post won’t go live until after the presents are already opened (no spoilers!) – Reading Reality Proudly Presents: Under Our Tree!

*****

For Mom: This last summer, my mother came to visit me up here in the Frozen North, and all she wanted to do was go rustle up some grizzlies. Ah, how about no? I am exceedingly opposed to being eaten. Tried directing her towards the Live Bear Cams (just as good without being eaten) to no avail. She wants to stalk the grizzlies.

The Grizzly Maze: Timothy Treadwell’s Fatal Obsession With Alaskan Bears by Nick Jans & Grizzly Man (documentary). Happy Holidays, Mom! You’re not allowed back in Alaska until you provide me with a full report of both the book and film (included because there is a recording of his death).

For Cass: Oh come on, you know perfectly well that friends and family have long since learned to adhere to ISBNs when buying books for us Book Hoarders, or just give gift cards. This year I have made a series of extremely special requests from my international contacts.

The Terry Pratchett Discworld Collector’s Library! Look at those glorious covers. Not available in the United States. AS IF THAT WOULD STOP ME. Plus, I needed to upgrade to hardcover. I’ve read through three copies each of Hogfather, and Small Gods.

For Grandma & Grandpa: Anyone who has ever lived here in the tundra understands that though we have an overwhelming bounty of fresh fish, we have no decent fruit. At all. By the time it gets here, it’s already going bad. To cope with this disparity, my grandparents and I have come to an understanding. I send them boxes of fresh Alaskan salman, halibut, scallops, and crab, and in return, they send me boxes of fresh apples, peaches, and pears. It really is a beautiful system. Right up until grandpa tells me that he breaded and fried fucking halibut cheeks as though they were goddamn fishsticks!

The New Alaska Cookbook by Kim Severson. Okay, grandpa? You have no more excuses. If you’re just going to bread and fry everything, I’ll start sending dogfish.

For Dad: My dad and I share a love for political science fiction. I first introduced him to Robert J. Sawyer with a Father’s Day gift of the Neanderthal Parralax. Which he dearly loved. He’s an easy mark this year.

Calculating God by Robert J. Sawyer. Science Fiction for the politically minded atheist! I could have gone with something by Dawkins, but it turns out he’s a misogynist motherfucker. Not giving him any of my money. We’ll try some PZ Meyers or Skepchick swag for your birthday.

For Nicki: You are unhealthy invested in Twilight. It’s a sickness that I’ve done my damnedest to cure you of, but just keep falling short. I blame the cocaine in the library books.

Team Human by Justine Larbalestier & Sarah Rees Brennan. Enjoy! Perhaps fiction can reach you in ways the Power & Control Wheel could not.

For Becky: I know that Pride & Prejudice is your favorite book of all time, and no author could ever compare to Jane Austen. How about we take some Jane Austen and make it aesthetically pleasing since I can’t slog my way through any of it?

Persuasion by Jane Austin via Litographs. That’s right. Your book is on a shirt. How awesome is that?! Just don’t get mad at me if people start squinting at your boobs. And on that note, Susan is getting Alice in Wonderland, and Rachel needs The Great Gatsby…..

*****

How about you? What books are under your tree?

Series Shakedown: InCryptid Short Stories by Seanan McGuire

Posted on December 24, 2013December 23, 2013 by Cass | Author : Cass | 4 1/2 Stars> Series Shakedown

I am a huge fan of Seanan McGuire’s InCryptid series, which, for the uninitiated is amazing.

Cryptid, noun:

1. Any creature whose existence has been suggested but not proven scientifically. Term officially coined by cryptozoologist John E. Wall in 1983.

2. That thing that’s getting ready to eat your head.

3. See also: “monster.”

The Covenant of St. George was founded to uphold one simple ideal: anything that was not present on the Ark—anything they deemed “unnatural”—needed to be destroyed. Monsters. Creatures of myth and legend. All of them would be wiped from the Earth in the name of Man’s dominion. Unfortunately for them, not all the monsters agreed with this plan…and neither did all the human beings.

After their rather abrupt departure from the Covenant, Alexander and Enid Healy found themselves alone in the world, but with a simple mission of their own: to protect the cryptids of the world from those who would harm them without just cause. It was a cause that would eventually claim both their lives, leaving their children, and their childrens’ children, to take up the fight. Now in the modern day, their descendants struggle to stay beneath the Covenant’s radar, while defending the cryptids from humanity—and humanity from the cryptids.

The main books are all set in the modern day, following the lives, deaths, and loves of the Healy’s great-great-grandchildren. Luckily for us, Seanan is a kind and benevolent ruler, gifting us with little bits of the InCryptid past between novels.

These (free!) short stories feature the adventures of the first generation of Healy cryptozoologists after their dramatic defection from The Covenant.

To date, Seanan has published 8 trips into the life and times of Fran and Jonathan Healy, with more on the way. But how do they stack up against the main series?

*****

The Flower of Arizona – In which Jonathan Healy meets his future wife and immediately learns that women in the Wild West can and will kick your skinny city ass. The Aeslin Mice feature prominently. They understand that Jonathan Healy is a bit slow on the uptake. (+)

One Hell of a Ride – Alternate Title: One Helluva First Date. Trains have never been so exciting. (+)

No Place Like Home – At this point we’re all beginning to suspect that Jonathan Healy is a bit austic or otherwise neurologically atypical. First time you ever brought a girl home and you’re trying to pass it off as not bringing a girl home? Hah! Good luck with that. This story is awkward for poor Fran, but a must-read for all fans of the Aeslin Mice. (+)

Married in Green – Years later and these two crazy kids are finally getting married! This fun romp is filled with foreshadowing, but becomes very sad after you read The First Fall. (+)

Sweet Poison Wine – What kind of honeymoon do cryptozoologists go on during the height of the depression? A kick-ass one! Sadly lacking in mice, but it’s probably for the best. I don’t think I’d lay odds on the Mice in a hotel run by Medusas. (+)

The First Fall – Anyone who has read the main books was probably confused before this story. The family tree at the beginning of Midnight Blue-Light Special didn’t match up with what Fran and Jonathan were showing us. Warning: these 29 pages will make you cry. (+)

Loch & Key – Family camping trips are boring. Swimming with Nessie’s American cousins is not nearly as interesting as you’d think. (-)

We Both Go Down Together – I call bullshit! Frances Brown-Healy almost slit her future husband’s throat within minutes of meeting him because he pulled a gun on her (and had a plan to get away with it). There is no goddamn way she’d just let some asshole get away with kidnapping her child. Chop him up and feed him to the fishes? Yes. Let go? No. (-)

*****

The InCryptid Short Stories simultaneously work as an introduction to the world of the InCryptids, and extras to keep diehard fans entertained between books. You don’t need to know anything about Verity Price to follow Frances Brown – but if you do know Verity, you’ll enjoy the connections between the past and future.

Go read these stories now! Then thank Seanan for her generosity by buying Discount Armageddon, Midnight Blue Light Special, and all the books of her alter-ego, Mira Grant.

(Observant Seanan fans will note I made no reference to the Toby series. I don’t care about Toby. Toby is simply taking up precious time Seanan could be spending on InCryptids, Newsflesh, and Parisitology.)

Review: Written in Red by Anne Bishop

Posted on December 23, 2013December 23, 2013 by Cass | Author : Cass | 2 1/2 Stars> book reviews> D Reviews> Uncategorized

Format read: ebook.
Formats available: Hardcover, ebook, audiobook.
Genre: Urban Fantasy.
Series: The Others #1.
Length: 433 pages.
Publisher: NAL.
Date Released: March 5, 2013.
Purchasing Info: Author’s Website, Goodreads, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Book Depository.

As a cassandra sangue, or blood prophet, Meg Corbyn can see the future when her skin is cut—a gift that feels more like a curse. Meg’s Controller keeps her enslaved so he can have full access to her visions. But when she escapes, the only safe place Meg can hide is at the Lakeside Courtyard—a business district operated by the Others.

Shape-shifter Simon Wolfgard is reluctant to hire the stranger who inquires about the Human Liaison job. First, he senses she’s keeping a secret, and second, she doesn’t smell like human prey. Yet a stronger instinct propels him to give Meg the job. And when he learns the truth about Meg and that she’s wanted by the government, he’ll have to decide if she’s worth the fight between humans and the Others that will surely follow.

My Thoughts:

Anne Bishop is a truly terrible writer. There is really no way to get around that fact. She’s overly fond of pig latin italics and Portentously Capitalized Common Nouns. You know going into her books that there will be utterly painful dialogue, rampant goth sensibilities, a whole lotta weird sexual shit, lazy world-building, and the Mary-est of Mary Sues.

Acrackedmoon provides this fantastic summary of Anne Bishop’s defining work – the Black Jewels trilogy:

It’s got dragons and unicorns and they all love her, and then when the cock-ring becomes too much he bites someone’s clitoris off.

Despite all of these blatant issues, Bishop somehow manages to remain hella entertaining. And so I picked up a copy of Written in Red. Maybe she’s turned over a creative leaf, maybe there will be something different in this series, maybe….. and I’m proven wrong in the prologue. Time to settle in and count the Bishopisms.

Pretentious Italics? Check! The “Others” call themselves the terra indigene. In every other sentence. Much the way we homo sapiens always refer to ourselves by genus and species classification. The protagonist has her own special designation of cassandra sangue – something repeated in as many conversations and internal monologues as possible. This here is some serious shit. Meg = Blood + Prophecy.
Capitalized with loving care? Absolutely! The Others and their stuff are Too Important to demean with lower case. Understand me bitches?
- Wolf, Crow, Hawk, Coyote, Grizzly, Elemental, Winter, Air, Spring, Fire, Earth, Water, Courtyard, Wolfgard, Chambers, Corvine, Hawkgard, Crowgard, and Pony Barn are adoringly capitalized at every opportunity.
- As is Meg’s third synonymous designation, “The Thousand Cuts.” Why give a protagonist one title when she can have three! Blood prophet vs cassandra sangue vs The Thousand Cuts. Which do you prefer? No matter, you’ll have the opportunity to see them all overused.
Goth Glitter? Check! Our three main ~~Vampire~~ Sanguinati characters are Vlad, Nyx, and Erebus. All of whom are, incidentally, tall, dark, sexy – and can literally transform into smoke.
Bizarre sexual dynamics? Double check.
- First up we have Meg, who experiences “ecstasy that is similar to prolonged sexual pleasure” anytime she verbalizes a prophecy from a cut. If she dares to keep the visions to her herself, she’ll suffer indescribable pain and not a smidgeon of pleasure. Do you understand? MASTURBATION IS BAD!
- Just in case there isn’t enough creepy for you, consider the obvious set up for a ~~werewolf~~ Wolf /~~vampire~~ Sanguinati love triangle in book 2. Meg’s pain when she cuts, or screams of fear when attacked, are excruciatingly arousing to The Others. Who spend an inordinate amount to time considering humans as “meat” and “prey.” Because nothing is sexier than knowing if your ladylove bleeds, she’ll suffer agonizing pain, orgasm, and then you can eat her.
Mary-Sue? Check! Meg is beautiful, kind to everyone, the most powerful prophet ever, and has a special scent that just drives all the Other boys wild. Everyone loves Meg upon meeting her, giving her unheard of privileges and special treatment. Oh, this area that NO ONE IS EVER ALLOWED IN EVER? Meg’ll get a pass within 30 seconds! Oh, these Others who don’t give a fuck about anything? Instants BFFs! They’ll destroy civilization for their precious Meg.
Lazy-World Building? With bonus racism! The Others are all basically First Nations, except they are monstrous killers who literally slaughter and eat the European colonists. They only let them live so they can take their stuff. Because First Nations people would never be able to invent anything so complicated as jewelry, dog beds, or cartoons. Tor notes that there was potential for a fascinating look at colonialism and a world were the Native populations won – but this is Anne Bishop. She’s not tackling sensitive issues. She’s wallowing in The Erotic Pain of the Thousand Organism Cuts while the Others devour the special meat of their enemies.

Escape Rating: D+ because there is nothing good about this book – and yet I read it all the way through. Anne Bishop remains inexplicably entertaining, despite showing no growth as a writer, or creative process deeper than a 13 year old’s livejournal.

Written in Red will pair well with a drinking game. Take a shot every time someone does something stunningly out of character because of Meg. Or every time Meg does something that would have gotten anyone else brutally killed, but is instantly forgiven.

A Murder of Crows will be released in 2014, during which I expect Meg will be threatened with rape, get laid, and instigate a war. Which will be decidingly won in Book 3 after the death of some redshirts nobody cared about anyways.

***FTC Disclaimer: Most books reviewed on this site have been provided free of charge by the publisher, author or publicist. Some books we have purchased with our own money or borrowed from a public library and will be noted as such. Any links to places to purchase books are provided as a convenience, and do not serve as an endorsement by this blog. All reviews are the true and honest opinion of the blogger reviewing the book. The method of acquiring the book does not have a bearing on the content of the review.

Review: The Blushing Bounder by MelJean Brooks

Posted on December 20, 2013December 19, 2013 by Cass | Author : Cass | 3 Stars> B Reviews> book reviews> Draconismoi> ebooks

Format Read: ebook.
Formats available: ebook, paperback (in Novellas & Stories).
Genre: Steampunk Romance.
Series: The Iron Seas #0.4.
Length: 50 pages.
Date Released: November 26, 2013.
Purchasing Info: Author’s Website, Goodreads, Amazon Barnes & Noble.

In The Iron Duke, Constable Newberry helped save all of England. But before the events of that novel, Constable Newberry’s faced a danger of another kind: to his heart, by the woman forced to marry him. What will it take for this prudish bounder to convince his wife to stay?

My Thoughts:

I began reading MelJean Brooks’ Iron Seas series because of the steampunk cyborgs, nanoagent zombies, and all manner of other awesome creations. I firmly classified the series as Steampunk, and just, well, overlooked the romance. Because I Do Not Read Romance. Or at least I do not enjoy reading romances. (I may have deleted the clearly romancey covers from Ilona Andrews’ The Edge series in order to perpetuate said delusions.)

The worldbuilding in The Iron Seas is top-notch and keeps me coming back for every installment. Which gets me to poor Constable Newberry, who, despite his status as a Blushing Red Giant, always manages to fade into the background. Unless he is being mocked by another character.

They made good time to his small, cozy flat on the second level of a converted mews, where Newberry’s sensible—and very pregnant—wife asked him to cut and wrap hunks of cheese, bread, and salted boiled eggs while she chatted with Mina. Newberry blushed for a record length of time after Temperance checked on his progress and complimented his skillful use of a knife, then again when she laid a farewell kiss on his cheek.
So sweet. It still surprised Mina that the prudish bounder had ever taken off his clothes long enough to make a baby, and she’d have wagered that he’d been fiery red the entire time.*

See? Even when he’s scoring free food, he’s still the butt of every joke. Newberry has more than earned his chance to shine – and so we travel back in time to the events that initially brought him to London. As usual, the world building was spectacular. This outing provided some much needed insight into the Mind of the Average Bounder, but……

It’s only 50 pages. There is no Kraken to battle, Slavers to defeat, or Zombies to slaughter. It really is just the story of how Newberry got his groove back. Which means that I was forced to admit I was reading – and enjoying – a romance. GODDAMNIT.

I’m not saying the story is flawless. It’s really not. As with many a romance, it generates conflict by the characters failing to discuss a Super Important Issue that really could have been resolved with one or two sentences. As it ultimately was.

Despite this, I found myself entirely engaged in Newberry’s relationship with his wife (thank god they didn’t name her Prudence), and invested in the outcome of the story. Especially since Mina was there to mock the Bounders.

“You think she’ll become a zombie, constable?”
“Yes,” Temperance answered for him. “Won’t she? This is what we’ve been told. What we’ve always been told.”
“And I’ve been told that bounders believed this, but didn’t think they were that stupid. But they are?”
“Apparently, sir.”

Poor Newberry, nobody wants to be branded a epic moron on their first day. Though this does explain why he elects to remain silent through much of the series.

Escape Rating: B- for forcing me to reconsider my ban on all things romance. Any fan of The Iron Seas will enjoy this prequel story, though I would not recommend it as a first outing into the series. In such a constrained space there is not a lot of room to explain the complex world we’re playing in.

*Quote from Mina Wentworth and the Invisible City. A short story that takes place shortly after The Iron Duke, and is, once again, unapologetically romantic in nature. Though it will be a worthwhile read for anyone who thought Mina’s story ended just a tad abruptly, it was tragically short on zombies.

***FTC Disclaimer: Most books reviewed on this site have been provided free of charge by the publisher, author or publicist. Some books we have purchased with our own money or borrowed from a public library and will be noted as such. Any links to places to purchase books are provided as a convenience, and do not serve as an endorsement by this blog. All reviews are the true and honest opinion of the blogger reviewing the book. The method of acquiring the book does not have a bearing on the content of the review.

Review: Countdown by Michelle Rowen (f/k/a Michelle Maddox)

Posted on November 20, 2013November 20, 2013 by Cass | Author : Cass | B Reviews> book reviews> D Reviews> NetGalley

Format Read: eARC from Netgalley
Format Available: paperback, ebook
Genre: YA, SFR
Length: 336
Publisher: Harelquin Teen
Date Released: September 24, 2013
Purchasing Info: Author’s Website, Goodreads, Amazon, Book Depository, IndieBound.

3 seconds left to live. Once the countdown starts, it cannot be stopped.

2 pawns thrown into a brutal underground reality game. Kira Jordan survived her family’s murder and months on plague-devastated city streets with hard-won savvy and a low-level psi ability. She figures she can handle anything. Until she wakes up in a barren room, chained next to the notorious Rogan Ellis.

1 reason Kira will never, ever trust Rogan. Even though both their lives depend on it. Their every move is controlled and televised for a vicious exclusive audience. And as Kira’s psi skill unexpectedly grows and Rogan’s secrets prove evermore deadly, Kira’s only chance of survival is to risk trusting him as much as her instincts. Even if that means running head-on into the one trap she can’t escape.

GAME OVER.

My Review: Countdown was originally published in 2008, under the nom de plume “Michelle Maddox,” as a fun adult science fiction romance romp. Unfortunately, I was not aware of the provenance of this book when I started reading. It simply began with an air of uncanny familiarity….

Countdown 2.0 was one of those books I grabbed on a whim from Netgalley. Who doesn’t love a scathing critique of Reality TV coupled with murder and mayhem? I chalked my unerring ability to predict dialogue and plot twists up to simple proof that YA had finally devoured itself to the point of unintentional self-parody.

It wasn’t until we built up to the obvious sex scene that I noticed something off. YA = no sex. Why am I so damn convinced this will lead to sex? More importantly, why isn’t it leading to sex? This is clearly supposed to be a sex scene. Nobody gives a shit about teens kissing.

At which point I became convinced this was some seriously ballsy plagiarism, and had to frantically search out the original version so I could warn the poor author of the complete disregard for her intellectual property. Imagine my surprise when I learned Michelle Rowen and Michelle Maddox were the same person.

**Countdown (2013) is a rewritten and revamped Young Adult version of Countdown (2008), which I wrote under the pen name Michelle Maddox**

So much for my abortive career as a Crusader for First Amendment Rights.

Michelle was being quite generous when describing Countdown 2.0 as “rewritten.” In a blatant attempt to ride The Hunger Games wave, her editor must’ve told her to turn the protagonists into teens, take out the sex, and they’d rebrand. Easy Money!

Which is quite literally all that was done.

Armed with this knowledge, Countdown 2.0 makes much more sense. In the opening chapters of Countdown 2.0, Rogan, all of 17, is scornful of Kira’s inclusion in the game. She’s just so “young, fresh, and sweet.” Because there is just a world of experience between 16 and 17. That 17th birthday is such a dark transition from innocent smiling child to jaded dead-eyed malefactor. Amiright?

Then the whole build-up to, and fall-out from, the “Reward Room” was absolute and utter bullshit. Teenagers have sex Michelle. Accept it. Own it. Depict it. If you’re too squeamish to depict realistic teen sex, then don’t write the scene.

Escape Rating D/B-: Countdown was a fun read back in 2008. It held up well, and had the advantage of being released before The Hunger Games. Michelle thought of it first! (She also had the decency to introduce a romance without the now obligatory love-triangle of stabbing eye pains.) Take that multi-millionaire author Suzanne Collins!

Countdown 2.0, however, was pretty terrible. You cannot transfer the decisions, dialogue, relationships, and characterizations of two adult whole cloth to two teenagers. Teens do not talk or act in the same way as their mature counterparts. By lowering the ages of the protagonists and making no other substantive changes (a brother becomes a father, citizenship papers become full-ride scholarship – it’s all cosmetic) you destroy the credibility of your world. If you want me to buy these kids as, well, kids, you have to change everything about them. Write Kira as she would have been as 16. Not as 26-year-old Kira pretending to be 16. Consistency is extremely important in scifi. We need to be able to relate to the characters to accept the future being depicted.

The cognitive dissonance is jarring throughout, particularly for anyone who read the original Countdown, and has the superior version floating around in their brain.

Verdict: Go pick up a copy of Countdown. Skip Countdown 2.0. There is plenty of YA Dystopian out there critiquing the media, video games, and violence in our youth. Most of them even do it better.

***FTC Disclaimer: Most books reviewed on this site have been provided free of charge by the publisher, author or publicist. Some books we have purchased with our own money or borrowed from a public library and will be noted as such. Any links to places to purchase books are provided as a convenience, and do not serve as an endorsement by this blog. All reviews are the true and honest opinion of the blogger reviewing the book. The method of acquiring the book does not have a bearing on the content of the review.

Series Shakedown: Psy/Changelings by Nalini Singh

Posted on October 25, 2013October 24, 2013 by Cass | Author : Cass | D Reviews> Series Shakedown

Rural Alaska towns are not known for their cell reception, or internet accessibility. This makes them most unfortunate locations to be stranded after a catastrophic car failure. Oh Subaru, why hast thou forsaken me?

Aforementioned small towns do, however, have community bookshelves. Free for pillaging!

I was left with a choice of either the futility of convincing rural Alaskans that NO THIS CAN’T WAIT UNTIL TUESDAY, or mainlining the Psy/Changeling series.

Marlene, devoted fangirl that she is, clearly supported my decision escape the crushing reality of a massive towing debt in favor of futuristic inter-special hook-ups.

Was this a wise decision?!

*****

Slave to Sensation: Hmm, how do you circumvent any extremely valid objections people might have to Their Glorious Leader shacking up with an enemy government lackey? Make her physiologically dependent on The Mighty Changeling Cock! (-)

Visions of Heat: Stalking, breaking and entering, sexual assault, and denial of necessary medical care. Someone get this woman a fucking protection order. The Changelings were all high-and-mighty about their anti-murder stance, but they don’t seem too terribly concerned with domestic violence and rape. (-)

Caressed By Ice: What is this? A man who respects a woman’s boundaries, follows her lead, is totally upfront about limitations he is placing on a relationship, and supports her accomplishments? Wolflings unite! Gotta keep the women away from this monster by any means necessary. (+)

Mine to Possess: How dare you be traumatized by being sexually assaulted as a child! That vagina belonged to me! I shall now slut-shame you, verbally abuse you, emotionally batter you, threaten you, demean you, demand sex, and make sure everyone knows that any twinge of emotional discomfort I am feeling is 150% your fault. Alternate Title: The Proto-Jacob. (-)

Hostage to Pleasure: Accidentally bleeding on a child saves his life. Provides necessary leverage to bang his mom. Nailing mommy-dearest psychically cures her twin sister’s homicidal impulses. Damn. All problems truly can be solved through the mighty power of the changeling cock. (-)

Branded by Fire: These groups have been allies for 10 years in an ongoing war against a common enemy. No one has problems with people sleeping with the enemy, but shacking up with an ally is an unthinkable act of betrayal? (-)

Play of Passion: Again with the pretend relationship barries. High-ranking women have been sleeping with their subordinates for millennia. Fuck this misogynist bullshit. Alternative Title: Woman on Top? Haha! That’s a good one. (-)

Kiss of Snow: This hookup has been building for awhile. Bonus points for not creepily stalking and/or isolating her as a teen. His series long ability to not perv over the jailbait, combined with her male relatives acknowledgement that she is an adult capable of making her own goddamn decisions (unlike every other male relative in the series) outweighs the triple crown Dues ex Machina.

How many impossible escape hatches do you need? We have a series long contrivance machine known as the changeling cock. Defrosting Cryo-lady and self-aware psychic networks are not particularly necessary.

See? The Doctor only needs one Deus ex Machina per episode. Reign yourself in!

*****

Is there an alternative title to this series? Something along the lines of the Sexpot Contrivance Machines would be appropriate.

Obviously I didn’t read every book – but unless one of the missing installments discusses how Psy is code for Sex God, I’m gonna call bullshit on the marathon sex sessions. Virgins do not go from zero to Kama Sutra 2.46 seconds. The Psy don’t even masturbate! You expect me to believe guys who have never, upon pain of extreme torture, laid a finger on their packages are going to be able to hold back for that synchronized orgasm? No.

Then we have Contrivance Machine known as the Mighty Changeling Cock. All psychic health issues can be solved by a good deep dicking. What happens when the Psy wants a divorce? Or has an affair?

These eye-roll inducing situations aside, I cannot support the inherit misogyny in every page of the series. Women may only sleep with men pre-approved by their brothers. Only evil women get abortions. Slutty women deserve whatever suffering they’ve endured. A woman’s disinterest in sex must be forcibly eradicated. Are you seeing a pattern? It’s a pattern of infantalizing women. They exist only as extensions of men, and if their preferences or actions run contrary to the men? Well then they are “brats” or “divas” and need to be brought to heel. Though isolation, emotional manipulation, psychological abuse, and physical and/or sexual assault.

The only two books that got a positive rating were those heavily featuring Judd. Who is, as far as I can tell, the only non-sexist man in the series. The rest of them are assholes.

Escape Rating: D.

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this: